


you can crash my car

by sugarbug



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fake Dating, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Vlogger AU, Youtuber AU, and a lot of introspection, implied of-age drinking, just lots of small moments, kawanishi plays matchmaker but is it intentional who's to say, yamaguchi and futakuchi are the other Vlog Squad members, yet another fic set in nyc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-30
Updated: 2020-06-30
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:14:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24994471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugarbug/pseuds/sugarbug
Summary: do you fake a relationship with one of your best friends for views or are you normal?
Relationships: Goshiki Tsutomu/Shirabu Kenjirou
Comments: 26
Kudos: 94
Collections: Shiratorizawa Fanweek 2020





	you can crash my car

**Author's Note:**

> this one goes out to leah, my goshira ride or die

“Can we get this over with?”

It was only noon, but the late-May heat was already unbearable. Kenjirou hated Manhattan enough already, but it was infinitely worse in the summer.

He was sitting on the edge of a fountain, and between the gentle water occasionally dotting his arm and the humidity, he just _knew_ the ends of his hair were starting to curl.

“Shut up, Kenjirou.”

That was _another_ thing that was unbearable. He hated when Kenji Futakuchi decided to make an appearance in their…whatever it was they all did together. Outings?

Anyways, he hated Kenji. Not only was it annoying to constantly think someone was addressing him, but Kenji was also just an absolute _pain._ He got on Kenjirou’s last nerve nearly every time he was around.

“Be nice, Kenji,” Taichi said as he fiddled with a camera on Kenjirou’s right.

Kenji was standing a few feet away and went out of his way to turn around and stick his tongue out at Kenjirou. _What a fucking child_ , Kenjirou thought.

“Okay, so, you guys requested that we try out different vegan spots around town, so that’s what we’re gonna be doing today!”

Tsutomu was smiling brightly into his own camera, turning to get everyone else in the shot before ending the recording. His smile didn’t drop even after the camera was off. He took the empty spot to Kenjirou’s left, sitting far too close for Kenjirou’s comfort. 

Kenjirou instinctively shifted to his right, only to bump shoulders with Taichi, who looked up from whatever the hell he was doing to give Kenjirou an unimpressed look.

“Are you excited?” 

Tsutomu was practically vibrating next to him, and Kenjirou could physically feel his patience being tested.

“I can’t even remember the last time I saw him eat a salad,” Taichi commented before Kenjirou could answer.

“Fuck off.”

This weekend’s events included an afternoon testing out vegan places, but they’d been out for at least an hour and hadn’t even stepped foot in one eatery. Kenjirou’s energy was waning.

“The first place is right around the corner,” Tadashi said from his spot on the ground. He was sitting with his legs crossed, phone balanced on his thigh as he looked up their destination on Google Maps.

“Can we go then?”

After what felt like forever (five minutes, max), they set off for the restaurant.

Kenjirou had to admit it was a cute place, stepping in as Taichi held the door open for him. It wasn’t the kind of spot he’d go to on his own, but he had to appreciate the hanging plants that crowded the building and curled along the walls.

“She’s old, and it’s about time she died,” Kenji argued with Taichi.

Kenjirou rolled his eyes, sliding into a wicker chair as far away from whatever _that_ conversation was as possible.

“Wanna look?” Tadashi took the seat next to him, slipping him a menu he’d grabbed on their way in.

Kenjirou accepted the menu, skimming through the options. Fried mushroom focaccia didn’t sound too bad.

“Wanna split this?” Tadashi leaned over, pointing at an avocado and pickled radishes sandwich.

“Sure.”

Their server came round not long after, and soon their table was buzzing as they waited for their food. More specifically, _Tsutomu and Kenji_ were buzzing.

It was times like these (which were far too often, in Kenjirou’s opinion) that he was infinitely glad they had inducted Tadashi into their friend group. Taichi was generally level-headed enough, but Kenjirou felt like he lost him a bit whenever Kenji was around to cause trouble. Tadashi was one of the few people who kept their little group grounded.

Kenjirou scrolled through his phone until their food arrived, pawing at his focaccia while Tadashi moved half of the avocado sandwich onto Kenjirou’s plate.

While he’d avoided sitting near Kenji, he’d ended up right in front of Tsutomu. This meant he was front and center now that Tsutomu had switched on his camera and was panning over their orders.

“What’s that, ‘Jirou?”

Kenjirou chewed slowly, pointing his fork at the focaccia and raising an eyebrow.

“Mhm,” Tsutomu nodded.

Kenjirou swallowed and cleared his throat. “Focaccia with mushrooms and, like, tomatoes and pesto and stuff.”

Tsutomu made an enlightened noise before following up with, “Wait, but what’s focaccia. What’s the focaccia part.”

“Focaccia is like,” Kenjirou sighed, “it’s like the bread part. Like thick, flat bread that you put stuff on. It’s like an appetizer.”

“You know what else is thick and flat?” Kenji could be heard saying at the end of the table.

Tadashi and Taichi groaned in unison off camera.

“Why do we keep bringing him along? What does he add to,” Kenjirou gestured loosely at Tsutomu’s camera, “this?”

“Tadashi, what d’cha get?” Tsutomu ignored Kenjirou’s question, camera swooping over to Tadashi’s plate.

“Mmm, splitting an avocado sandwich thing with Kenjirou,” Tadashi began, “and then I also got roasted brussel sprouts.”

Tsutomu wrinkled his nose at this, which earned a laugh from Tadashi.

“What? They’re good!”

Tadashi was radiant, and his sunny persona was something that Kenjirou would forever be envious of. How could someone be so effortlessly pleasant? It was beyond him.

“I got one of their personal pizzas, which has a sweet potato crust,” Tsutomu drew the camera to his own plates, “and a side of quinoa.”

Three hours, two other vegan cafes, and one unfortunate sunburn on the back of his neck later, Kenjirou was finally back in his apartment.

He was nursing an iced peppermint tea he’d snagged from the last cafe they’d visited, fleshing out an essay at their kitchen table. In the living room, Tsutomu was sprawled out on the couch, editing his newest video.

He heard the pitter-patter of footsteps and looked up to see Taichi entering the kitchen.

“What are you working on?” he asked, pulling a glass out of the cabinet.

“Scholarship essay.”

“Didn’t you already submit, like, five this week?”

Kenjirou shrugged. He _had_ , but only because college wasn’t going to pay for itself. Plus, if he wanted to get a spot in a research lab next summer, he had to start applying now.

It was great that Taichi’s parents paid half their rent, but not everyone had their family to fall back on.

“Take a break,” Taichi filled his glass up with tap water then shuffled over to Kenjirou. “I wanna go over some channel stats with ‘Tomu, and I kind of have an idea that I need your help with.”

Taichi’s face was expressionless, but something hidden in the tone of his voice made Kenjirou uneasy. He slowly closed his laptop and grabbed his tea before Taichi could swipe it and take a sip.

“Fine,” Kenjirou narrowed his eyes, “but make it fast.”

They ambled into the living room, but not before Kenjirou switched the overhead light off. Their electric bill was high enough with the air conditioning running round the clock. 

Taichi squeezed into the free space on the couch, which was limited since Tsutomu’s 6-foot-tall Gumby-esque body took up nearly the entire surface. Kenjirou settled into their lone armchair, taking slow sips of his iced tea. He picked at the upholstery, waiting for Taichi to lay out his plan.

Taichi had spent a fair amount of time managing Tsutomu’s channel. It hadn’t been a big deal when Tsutomu only had around one hundred subscribers, but now that he actually had a proper following, Taichi’s wisdom when it came to analytics and digital marketing was highly valued.

“So,” Taichi pulled his own laptop from their coffee table and flicked through some tabs, “I wanted to talk to you about a couple projects I think might be worthwhile for the channel.”

“Sure!” Tsutomu’s reply was direct, but his eyes were still glued to his computer, splicing clips and adjusting volumes. He cocked his head to the side as he replayed the intro, one headphone in, the other dangling alongside his thigh.

“I think,” Taichi began, “we should run a giveaway, maybe pick a winner at the end of the month?”

“Yeah, that sounds good!” Tsutomu nodded.

“I also think it wouldn’t hurt to add a few more items to the merch shop. Maybe do that in conjunction with the giveaway?”

“Mhm,” Tsutomu mumbled, squinting at his computer screen.

Initially, Tsutomu hadn’t wanted to sell merch at all. Taichi had goaded him into it though, pulling up tweets and comments where fans were begging for shirts and hoodies.

Taichi’s intro to graphic design skills really came in handy at that point, and they were able to essentially build a brand out of their friend group. Kenjirou was hesitant to participate at first—what would happen if they drifted apart?

But he’d known Taichi for, like, _ever_. Tsutomu he’d only known for the past two years, a friend Taichi had made in a philosophy gen ed class. Unfortunately, once Tsutomu attached himself to a person, he was hard to shake off.

They hadn’t gotten along at first. Kenjirou had been positive they’d _never_ get along, but he slowly found himself being swayed by Tsutomu’s tenacity in everything he did. It was admirable—endearing, even.

Then, suddenly, one day he found himself snickering at some stupid (and honestly harmless, since the boy was frighteningly wholesome) joke Tsutomu had made at Taichi’s expense. It was something like slow motion, the way Tsutomu’s eyes had comically widened, turning to Kenjirou to confirm he’d heard correctly. He’d made Kenjirou _laugh_.

Or, at least, that’s what he would argue when people asked how they became friends. Kenjirou would insist that “friend” was a generous term, but he knew their relationship had long since passed the acquaintance stage.

They were roommates, after all, and Kenjirou wouldn’t be roommates with just anyone.

Taichi was still rambling on about the logistics of a giveaway, and Kenjirou had grown preoccupied with pulling at his bangs. They were getting long, and the summer humidity that they’d drowned in that afternoon had brought out the natural wave in his hair.

“So, this is where Kenjirou would come in,” Taichi said, snapping Kenjirou’s attention back to the conversation.

“Huh?” he asked.

He looked between Taichi and Tsutomu, trying to evaluate what stage of the conversation they’d reached without him. Taichi appeared as neutral as usual, but Tsutomu looked slightly panicked. The fact that his editing had been forgotten was an obvious sign that something was off.

“I said Tsutomu should stage a fake relationship,” Taichi explained, “specifically with you.”

_“Excuse me?”_

“I—I also think that’s a bad idea,” Tsutomu spluttered.

“Look, the channel is doing well, but we’ve kind of hit a plateau as far as sub counts go. You could really use something to draw in new fans, and viewers are obsessed with YouTube couples.”

“Why _me?_ ” Kenjirou’s voice came out higher pitched than he would have liked, but he figured it would be overlooked considering the absurd nature of the proposal.

“I’ve parsed through comments and tweets and stuff, and you’re our best bet for this kind of plan to take off,” Taichi set his computer back on the coffee table and pulled one leg up to his chest.

“Tadashi already has a boyfriend, and everyone thinks Kenji and I are a thing. The people who don’t think he’s dating me think that he’s dating _you_ ,” Taichi nodded towards Kenjirou, “but barely anyone ships him with Tsutomu.”

It wasn’t like Kenjirou was oblivious to the comments people left on Tsutomu’s videos, speculating whether he was dating someone else in their _vlog squad_ (the phrase alone made Kenjirou full-body shudder whenever it was mentioned). He tried not to harp on it though because, frankly, it didn’t matter. Tsutomu _wasn’t_ dating any of them, and why should Kenjirou even care anyway?

Like, maybe he had liked Tsutomu a l _ittle_ bit in a slightly more than platonic way at one point. But that was a long time ago, and Kenjirou had even had a brief but semi-substantial relationship since then.

Yeah, he definitely wasn’t into Tsutomu any more. Sure, maybe it was cute that he played goofy pop songs to time himself while he brushed his teeth. And, yeah, maybe Kenjirou watched all his videos even though he was around more than half the time when they were being filmed. And perhaps he thought that Tsutomu’s eyes were awfully sparkly when the morning sun trickled in through their kitchen window—

Okay, the point was that he _didn’t_ like Tsutomu. But he wasn’t stupid either, and he knew that a staged relationship could only end in disaster for the channel. What would people say if they found out it was fake? Tsutomu could lose a lot of viewers.

Plus, he was the most honest and earnest person Kenjirou had ever met. He doubted Tsutomu would even want to go through with something like this.

“Why don’t you do it?” Kenjirou asked Taichi, though he’d begun to think that maybe this wouldn’t be the _worst_ idea after all.

Think about it: sure, he didn’t like Tsutomu like _that_ anymore, but this would be a good way to squash any lingering feelings. It’d be a very literal reminder of how absolutely terrible it would be to ever date Tsutomu.

“Look at me,” Taichi said, “do I look like a romantic to you?”

Tsutomu’s panic-induced trance seemed to lift for a moment, as he snorted and added, “As if Kenjirou is?”

“Fuck off. I can be romantic,” Kenjirou snapped back.

“Okay, then prove it,” Taichi said. He stood up, grabbing his laptop and staring at his roommates. “I have to send out some emails to sponsors. We’ll work out the logistics of this all tomorrow.”

With that, he was gone, leaving Kenjirou and Tsutomu to sit in the awkward silence that hung in the room.

“We don’t have t—” Tsutomu spoke up finally.

“It’s whatever,” Kenjirou cut him off. He stood up, brushing off non-existent dust from his shorts. “Just don’t do anything weird.”

Tsutomu made a noise of indignation, but whatever argument he was prepared to make was left unheard.

Kenjirou had already left the room.

🔀

Tsutomu was not looking forward to their meeting. Frankly, he was floored that Kenjirou had agreed (begrudgingly) to it at all.

But here they were, tucked away inside a cafe around the corner from their apartment, ready to discuss whatever plan Taichi had concocted.

Taichi was _smart_ and innovative. He didn’t go out of his way to join in during conversations, but when he did, it was always with something witty. That’s what Tsutomu liked about him—they were qualities he himself lacked.

But the plan he’d presented the day before was…questionable, at best. And that was coming from Tsutomu, who had questionable ideas daily (or so he’d been told).

It could go horribly awry for any number of reasons. First of all, he _hated_ lying to his viewers. They liked him for him! He didn’t put on a facade when he filmed (despite what some hate comments might claim), and he didn’t want to break the trust he’d built with his audience.

The even bigger obstacle was his stupidly massive crush on Kenjirou.

Yeah, that was kind of an issue.

And it was obvious Kenjirou didn’t feel the same, or else he never would have agreed to it, right? 

Sure, he’d been hesitant at first, but this was _Kenjirou we_ were talking about—Tsutomu couldn’t see him being eager to fake date _anyone_. The fact that he’d agreed was a testament to their friendship, which made Tsutomu feel even _worse_ because, wow, he was being friend-zoned _hard_ and in the worst possible way.

He groaned internally, slumping down into the booth seat, completely oblivious to whatever Taichi was saying.

“Oi,” Kenjirou snapped his fingers in front of Tsutomu’s face, “are you even listening? This is _your_ channel.”

“Oh!”

Tsutomu nearly knocked his iced coffee over in his haste to sit up.

“Like I was saying,” Taichi said slowly, making sure Tsutomu was actually listening this time around, “I think you should make, like, two relationship-centric videos. For the rest of your usual videos, you can just be more mushy than you usually are—”

“Which is none,” Kenjirou interjected firmly.

Taichi gave him an unimpressed stare before moving on.

“Right. So, I think VidCon is a great place to really play this up. We can make another video or two highlighting the relationship after VidCon, and then you can make one of those tearful breakup videos.”

Taichi tapped his pen against his notebook, looking back and forth between his friends for reactions.

“VidCon?” Kenjirou finally said, as if he had to reboot before he could finally reply. “You want us to do this in _public?_ ”

Ouch. Was the idea of dating Tsutomu _that_ revolting to him?

“You can’t just say you’re dating and then completely avoid each other when you’re in front of fans, dumbass.”

Kenjirou scoffed, taking an angry sip of his cappuccino.

“Any comments?” Taichi looked across the table at Tsutomu.

Tsutomu made a pitiful noise in lieu of an actual statement, laying his head down on the table.

“I hate lying,” he finally whined.

“See, he’s never gonna be able to pull this off.”

“I totally can pull this off,” Tsutomu’s head shot up, and he found himself in a glare-off with Kenjirou. “ _You’re_ the one who won’t be able to pull this off.”

“ _I’m_ actually good at lying,” Kenjirou’s eyes narrowed even further.

“Great, so, since you’re both so convinced you can do this better than the other, we can get started filming the first video tomorrow.”

Taichi stood up, messenger bag and iced chai latte in hand, and left before Tsutomu or Kenjirou could argue another word.

⏩

Tsutomu stared glumly at the video outline Taichi had printed out.

“Can’t we just do a normal video?” Kenjirou asked, scowling at his own copy.

“Boyfriend tag videos _are_ normal. Like, every YouTube couple has done a relationship tag video at some point in their career.”

Taichi was setting up the camera, while Tsutomu and Kenjirou were seated on the edge of Tsutomu’s bed. If their abysmal expressions didn’t cue viewers in to the fact that this was all a sham, the uncomfortable distance between them certainly would.

“Alright, you ready?” Taichi asked.

They’d been equipped with whiteboards Taichi had picked up at the dollar store, and the video outline, which held a list of questions that they’d be testing each other on.

“Shouldn’t we script the answers for this?” Kenjirou pushed. “It’ll be obvious if we don’t get most of them right.”

“No, it’ll come off forced if we script it. Plus,” Taichi argued, “you guys _are_ friends. It shouldn’t be that hard to guess the right answers.”

Kenjirou sighed, shifting so that he was just a smidge closer to Tsutomu.

“Let’s get this over with.”

▶️

_“Alright, so, a few of you suspected this, but Kenjirou and I have been dating for—”_

_Tsutomu seems to falter, blinking rapidly before Kenjirou jumps in._

_“Don’t ruin it with the details.”_

_He’s firm, but his voice holds no malice. Tsutomu laughs, and it’s obvious he’s nervous._

_“You’re right, it’s not important. Anyways,” he runs a hand through his hair, “we’re going to be doing the boyfriend tag today.”_

_They ready their whiteboards, and Tsutomu reads the first question. They make it through a few of the questions before Kenjirou seems to grow frustrated._

_“_ Are you a morning or night person? _I don’t know? You like both?”_

_“Yeah, but I like one better than the other,” Tsutomu insists._

_Kenjirou groans before scribbling something on his board. Tsutomu counts to three, and they both flip their whiteboards around to reveal matching answers of_ morning _._

_“I honestly just guessed at random for that one,” Kenjirou says, scrubbing the marker off his board before frowning down at his freshly blue-stained fingertips._

_They shuffle through a few more questions with moderate success. Tsutomu appears to have a slight advantage, which seems to bring out the competitive side in Kenjirou. The number of right answers increases as they fall into a rhythm._

_“Okay, we’re going out to eat. Where are we going?” Tsutomu asks._

_“Oh, easy.”_

_“Easy?” Tsutomu asks, eyes focused on whatever he’s scribbling._

_“Yeah,” Kenjirou nods, capping his marker once he’s finished writing._

_“Okay, ready? 1, 2, 3!”_

_They flip their boards, both reading_ diner on 4th _. Tsutomu whoops and throws up his hand, which Kenjirou reluctantly slaps with his own, the tiniest of smiles edging its way onto his face._

_“Alright, that was the last question. Good one to end it on,” Tsutomu concludes._

_The tense energy present at the beginning of the video has dissipated. Tsutomu rattles off his goodbye and thanks everyone for watching, Kenjirou nodding when appropriate. They wave (well, Tsutomu waves—Kenjirou just throws up a two-finger salute), and the video fades to the outro screen._

_672 COMMENTS_

**_izzy_ ** _(3 hours ago)_

_I FUKCIGN KNEW ITTTTT_

**_beacring3_ ** _(7 hours ago)_

_i ship it like if u agree_

_edit: omg thank u guys for 200 likes <3 _

**_lilianaIndigo_ ** _(7 hours ago)_

_are they actually dating? Cause kenjirou is always flirting with kenji and taichi lol_

**_A Common Bagel_ ** _(8 hours ago)_

_the way tsutomu is the cutest person ever :’)_

⏸

Their first video went over ridiculously well, which only led to a surplus of _I told you so_ ’s from Taichi. Tsutomu had scrolled through the comments on the video for longer than he’d liked to admit after the first day it was posted.

It wasn’t something he hadn’t done before—on past videos, his heart always skipped a beat when someone would comment on the dynamic he shared with Kenjirou.

But now it was _real_. Well, fake real. So, fake. Ugh.

But people thought it was real! Which meant their responses were genuine, and if _they_ thought there was really something between himself and Kenjirou, then maybe there _was_ something real between them and—

He groaned, throwing an arm over his eyes. He’d been outlining the vlog he planned on filming later that afternoon, but he’d gotten distracted thinking about this stupid fake relationship. It’d been a week since they posted the initial video, and he hadn’t uploaded anything since.

He had a regularly scheduled video each week, but he was known for throwing up another one or two videos throughout the week. They were usually a bit shorter and tended just to be daily vlogs, but his audience still ate them up.

Today’s plans consisted of going to the Museum of Modern Art with Kenjirou, Tadashi, and Taichi. Maybe they’d grab dinner afterward?

He sighed, sitting up and getting his equipment together and pulling on a clean t-shirt. 

He found Taichi and Kenjirou waiting in the living room, watching a rerun of a reality show that Taichi followed religiously. Some island one? He could never remember the name of it, even though they watched it every week.

Tsutomu honestly liked it too, and he and Taichi always watched the new episodes together. It was always the best when Kenjirou happened to join their watching sessions though because he dealt out the best insults. No reality star was left unscathed when Kenjirou was at his prime, popcorn in his lap and distance glasses (for the nights when he was sick of wearing his contacts) slipping down his nose.

This afternoon he was only half-heartedly watching though, alternating between focusing on the television screen and scrolling through his Instagram feed.

“Hey, you guys ready?”

They slid off the couch and grabbed their own belongings before following Tsutomu out of the apartment, Taichi pausing to lock up before they shuffled down the stairs.

The subway was muggy, and Kenjirou looked particularly miserable. He livened up the slightest when Taichi fished his water bottle out of his backpack and passed it over. Tsutomu frowned. Why hadn’t he thought of packing a water bottle? And, more specifically, why hadn’t he thought of packing one for Kenjirou? He couldn’t have his boyfriend overheating in a crowded subway car.

 _Fake_ boyfriend, his brain reminded him.

He busied himself with staring out the window until they reached their stop.

Tadashi, true to nature, had arrived early and was already waiting for them when they arrived. He waved, pushing off the wall he’d been leaning against to go greet them.

He chatted animatedly about his weekend as they entered and bought tickets, talking about some planetarium his boyfriend had taken him to.

Tsutomu briefly wished he had fallen for someone who actually knew how to smile more than once a month. 

He actually _had_ had a crush on Tadashi when they first met.

They had shared an agriculture class during his freshman year, and when Tadashi had shown him his wildlife journal, packed with cute doodles and flowing handwriting, Tsutomu was convinced he was godsent.

His crush was short-lived though because a few months later, Taichi had introduced him to Kenjirou, who took one look at Tsutomu and immediately excused himself from their university’s dining hall.

Unfortunately, if there was anything Tsutomu liked more than bright smiles and hazel freckles, it was a challenge. And Kenjirou? He was a _challenge_.

Tsutomu would never forget the first time he made Kenjirou laugh. It was some self-burn after he’d totally tanked a calculus test and was moping in their student union building, the two of them waiting for Taichi. Kenjirou’s laugh was weird, but kinda sparkly? Could a laugh be sparkly?

Whatever it was, Tsutomu knew then and there that he wanted to hear it a million more times. A _billion_. He brightened immediately, failed literature test long forgotten. And, sadly, his fluffy crush on Tadashi.

Yet again, Kenjirou caught him off guard, punching him in the shoulder.

“Don’t just fucking stand there.”

Tsutomu rebooted, pulling his camera out and filming his friends who were walking towards one of the newest exhibits. He fell in line behind Kenjirou, zooming in on his backpack.

“You got a new patch?” Tsutomu asked, running his fingers across an iron-on patch in the shape of an eel.

“It’s from our trip to the aquarium back in March. Don’t touch.”

Kenjirou stretched his hand back over his shoulder to try and pry Tsutomu’s fingers off his backpack.

“Why? It’s not like it’s a tattoo,” Tsutomu argued, dodging his hand.

He’d thought Kenjirou had only been trying to swat his hand away from messing with the patch, but when he finally caught Tsutomu’s hand, he didn’t let go. He pulled it down between them, maneuvering Tsutomu’s hand in his own until their fingers were threaded together.

Tsutomu wondered if heatstroke would be a convincing excuse if he happened to pass out right then and there. His camera followed his line of vision as his gaze dropped to their joined hands before panning back up to Kenjirou, whose face was flushed but as sullen as ever.

“We’re gonna lose them. Hurry up,” Kenjirou pointedly avoided eye contact, only pulling at Tsutomu’s hand to catch up with Taichi and Tadashi, who really _had_ gotten pretty far ahead.

“Oh!” Tadashi exclaimed when they finally caught up, looking at their hands. “So…is this—I mean, are you, um—”

“It’s for the video, yeah,” Taichi saved him from his stuttering.

“Ah!” Tadashi nodded, though he hardly looked convinced. “I wasn’t sure when I saw your last video, but…cool, I guess?”

“Taichi thought it’d be good for views,” Kenjirou fixed Taichi with a particularly fierce glare.

Taichi only gave a carefree smile in return, turning to take in the first exhibit they’d wandered into.

Tsutomu tried his best to focus on filming the pieces he found most interesting and pretty shots of Taichi and Tadashi, but he found it hard to think straight when Kenjirou was pulling him around. Tsutomu was certain his hand was sweaty and gross, but if it was, Kenjirou didn't comment on it.

He finally let go when he wanted to look at some traveling exhibit that Tsutomu had no interest in. Taichi joined him, promising Tsutomu they could meet at the exit in half an hour.

Once they were gone, Tsutomu paused in the hallway to take a deep breath. Tadashi caught him around the corner, linking arms with him as they traversed through one of the contemporary art galleries.

“So,” Tadashi began slowly, “you guys are faking a relationship?”

Tsutomu nodded.

Tadashi hummed, and they walked in silence for a few more moments, stopping in front of a shockingly pink canvas with orange line art.

“You like him for real though, don’t you?”

Tsutomu squeezed his eyes shut. Maybe if he kept them shut long enough, he’d open them to find out this whole charade had been one long, absurd dream.

Unfortunately, when he opened his eyes, he was still staring at a painting he didn’t understand, and Tadashi was still staring at _him_ , waiting for a reply. Though, based on Tsutomu’s reaction, it was pretty clear what the answer was.

“Oh, Tsu,” Tadashi sighed. “Kenjirou is great, but he’s…”

“Yeah.”

Kenjirou was pretty indescribable, but if anything was clear, it was that this whole thing was only going to end with Tsutomu’s heart in shambles.

“Just be careful, okay?”

There Tadashi went, being the mother hen of their friend group. Tsutomu was glad he had someone looking out for him. Sometimes it felt like he was in the deep end, no clue how to navigate adulthood, while everyone around him seemed to have it all together.

“I will,” Tsutomu forced a smile.

When they finally reunited with their friends outside, he couldn’t help but unlink arms with Tadashi to walk beside Kenjirou.

Where Kenjirou went, he’d follow.

🔀

Packing was probably the worst fucking thing in the world, especially when someone was shoving a camera in your face.

Kenjirou was sitting on his bedroom floor, staring dejectedly at his half-full suitcase. Tsutomu was doing rounds, alternating between Kenjirou’s packing process, Taichi’s, and his own.

It’s not that Kenjirou really needed all that many clothes for a five-day trip, but what if he needed _backup_ clothes? And should he bring his own towel? Could you _really_ trust hotel towels?

He didn’t even want to go to VidCon, but he’d solidified his spot as a part of the channel, and that meant he was being dragged along to California.

“Are you gonna finish anytime soon?” Tsutomu asked from his doorway.

“Can you fuck off?” Kenjirou leaned his head back against the edge of his bed.

“Rude,” Tsutomu concurred. “Do you want help? You should pack that one shirt with the orange and yellow stripes! The pastel one? It looks really cute on you.”

Kenjirou’s head snapped up at that, and Tsutomu seemed to have noticed his misstep because he followed it up with a smart “Um.”

“I’m gonna go check on Taichi again,” he finally said, leaving Kenjirou to ruminate on whatever the hell had just happened.

He had learned very quickly that this whole fake dating thing was a complete fucking mistake. Why did he think this would effectively rid him of his stupid feelings? Did he have worms for brains?

They’d been a little more touchy in the vlogs, but there hadn’t been a _massive_ shift in their preexisting relationship. After all, Kenjirou wasn’t big on PDA to begin with, so it was easy enough to work that into the whole fake relationship thing.

Of course, he’d sort of rocked the boat with the whole hand-holding thing during their museum vlog. He had trouble looking Tsutomu in the eye for the rest of that day.

He knew that Tsutomu dropping the word _cute_ shouldn’t affect him so much—he didn’t even say Kenjirou was cute, he said the _shirt_ was cute—but Kenjirou’s stomach was still in knots over it regardless.

It haunted him as he finished packing, as he settled into bed that night, and as they took an Uber to the airport the next morning.

It finally left his mind when they were strapped into their seats on the plane, and only because Tsutomu was _falling asleep on his shoulder._ He heard Taichi and Kenji snickering behind him, but there was no way to turn around and glare at them without waking Tsutomu.

Frankly, he was tired too. He wondered if it was in his best interest to get some sleep as well.

Their flight was around five hours, and he knew the next few days would be nonstop. They had plans to collaborate with a few other YouTubers that Tsutomu had befriended online, and of course there was the event itself as well.

It didn’t help that they had to wake up at 4:00 AM to get to the airport in time. His fatigue must have been showing because Tadashi placed a gentle hand on his forearm.

“Get some rest.”

Shirabu gave as much of an appreciative smile as he could manage before resting his head against his seat and closing his eyes. His brain was still buzzing over Tsutomu snuggled up against his shoulder, but his exhaustion won over, and he felt himself dozing off.

When he woke up, his nose was being tickled by raven hair. He groaned when he realized he’d woken up to a crick in his neck. His stiff neck was forgotten when he _really_ came to and realized the hair tickling his nose was _Tsutomu’s,_ and that his cheek was pressed up against the top of Tsutomu’s head.

He must have shifted around too much because Tsutomu was stirring too. He lifted his head without warning and knocked his forehead against Kenjirou’s chin.

“Ow! Fuck!” Kenjirou hissed, cupping his jaw.

“What?” Tsutomu blinked, bleary before the situation came into focus. “Oh! Kenjirou! I’m sorry!”

“You shouldn’t swear, Kenjirou. There are kids on this flight,” Taichi said from behind them.

Tsutomu was no longer taking up residence on half his upper torso, so Kenjirou swung around in his seat to flip Taichi off. He was only met with more snickers.

This was going to be a really, really long five days.

⏩

The convention center was a welcome reprieve from the California heat that they’d been subjected to the day before.

They’d spent their first day touring the area, jumping from store to store, stopping for food and drinks every now and then.

While he wasn’t a fan of the massive crowds, Kenjirou was thankful to be far from the scathing summer sun outside. 

He tugged at the creator pass around his neck. It felt out of place—he really wasn’t a content creator at _all_. However, the channel Taichi had forced him to make last year had amassed a fair amount of subscribers, despite it only having three short videos on display.

The first (and best) one was a short clip he’d recorded of Taichi trying to teach Tsutomu how to skateboard. Needless to say, it had not ended well.

Kenjirou smiled faintly as he remembered it. It’d been a good day. They’d all finished their finals, and they’d spent the entire day fucking around in a park near their apartment. There’d been quite a few highlights that’d ended up Kenjirou’s Snapchat story, which rarely got any action to begin with.

After Tsutomu had fallen yet _again_ trying to catch his balance on Taichi’s skateboard, they headed home, where Kenjirou wiped down his skinned knees with antiseptic. Did it really matter if he had used a few of his cat-themed band aids (the ones he forbade Taichi from touching) on Tsutomu’s knees? No, no it did not.

He glanced at the faint white lines that had scarred Tsutomu’s knees from that day. He wondered if they’d ever fade completely.

They were currently huddled on the floor of the convention center, planning the rest of their day. So far, they’d attended two panels, briefly left the building to get a mediocre lunch from Chipotle, and talked with a few YouTubers that Tsutomu and Taichi shared a Discord server with.

Kenjirou had zoned out long enough to miss the tailend of the conversation, only snapping out of his thoughts when he realized everyone else had stood up.

Tsutomu stretched out his hands to Kenjirou, and Kenjirou begrudgingly accepted. Tsutomu pulled him up, moving to drop his hands. Kenjirou dropped his left one but tightened his grip on the other. Tsutomu jumped a little, but schooled his expression back into something normal (though, to his credit, very little about Tsutomu was normalto begin with).

“Are you ever gonna get used to this?” Kenjirou muttered.

“You don’t even give me a warning!” Tsutomu squeaked.

“Whatever.”

They walked around, chatting with fans whenever they came up. Well, Tsutomu, Tadashi, and Kenji were doing most of the chatting. Taichi and Kenjirou tended to hang back and watch.

They ended up in a circle with a few creators Tsutomu had befriended over the past few years. Tsutomu was talking rather animatedly, naturally stealing the spotlight as he was so prone to doing. It was far too endearing, and it was making Kenjirou start to feel a little queasy.

He excused himself and went on a search for the nearest bathroom. They’d passed one earlier, but the line had been too long to bother stopping. He had time to kill now though. He needed a few minutes to recharge anyways—even if he wasn’t actively participating in the conversations, all the interaction with unfamiliar people was starting to take its toll on him.

He had finally found a bathroom and was returning to his friends when he heard someone call his name. At first he thought he’d misheard, until he heard it _again_. He frowned, turning around towards the voice.

A group of teenagers sitting on the floor flagged him down. He reluctantly stopped and shuffled a little closer.

“Are you really dating Tsutomu?” one of them blurted out.

“Oh my god!”

“You can’t just _say_ stuff like that!”

The group was in a frenzy, alternating between scolding their friend and staring nervously at Kenjirou.

Kenjirou turned to look at his _own_ friend group across the hall. Even at a distance, he could see Tsutomu talking wildly to some strangers, his hands flying around as he was speaking. Kenjirou couldn’t help but half-smile.

“Yeah,” Kenjirou sighed, “unfortunately.”

He didn’t wait around for a response.

It wasn’t really anyone’s business if he happened to squeeze himself into the space between Tsutomu and Taichi when he got back. 

And it _definitely_ wasn’t anyone’s business if Tsutomu gave him a shy smile when he noticed that Kenjirou had returned.

▶️

_A hotel suite packed with people slowly comes into focus before the camera is hastily jerked around._

_“Are you gonna sing something, Eita?” Taichi asks._

_Eita Semi, a YouTuber famous for doing indie covers, is sitting on the floor._

_“What do you want me to sing?”_

_“Dunno. You’re the music connoisseur, not me.”_

_Eita laughs and starts to say something, but the video cuts to a balcony, revealing a skyline view, dozens of twinkling lights blurring together. People are chatting, and everyone seems to be at least a little bit tipsy._

_“Taichi!”_

_Taichi turns the camera towards Tsutomu, who’s flagging him down. He’s sitting on a bench, and Kenjirou is pressed up against his side, clearly on the verge of falling asleep. There’s two empty cans of hard lemonade on the coffee table in front of them._

_“We’re gonna have to carry him back to our room,” Taichi laments._

_Tsutomu hums, laying his head on top of Kenjirou’s. Kenjirou pushes at his head half-heartedly before settling back against Tsutomu’s arm._

_“Tsu, like half the people in the comments of your recent videos are wondering what you even like about Kenjirou,”_

_“Everything!” Tsutomu yells loud enough that Kenjirou flinches._

_“Everyone thinks Kenjirou is mean,” Tsutomu yelps when Kenjirou pinches his side, “_ but _he’s actually really nice.”_

_Kenjirou’s hands still._

_“He hangs up my hoodies when I leave them on the couch, and he always helps me study for my tests. If he stops for coffee on his way home, he always gets me a drink too. Plus, he comes to all my games, and he helps me practice when he has free time!”_

_By the time he’s done speaking, Kenjirou has snaked his arms around Tsutomu’s waist._

_“Gross,” Taichi decides._

_Kenjirou isn’t even bothering to keep his eyes open at this point, so the only reaction comes from Tsutomu, in the form of a very dramatic pout._

_The camera flips around, and Taichi shakes his head in disappointment._

_“All my friends are lightweights.”_

_There’s a clip of Tadashi doing shots with twins who run a rather infamous prank channel, then it cuts back to a close-up of Kenjirou, who Tsutomu and Taichi are attempting to drag back to their hotel room._

_“Say goodnight,” Taichi says._

_“G’nigh,” Kenjirou mumbles._

_“Perfect, thanks,” Taichi says._

_The outro music starts to play, and the video cuts to a black screen featuring Taichi’s social media usernames in white font._

_207 COMMENTS_

**_becca cobalt_ ** _(1 hour ago)_

 _ok wait but did ya’ll see tooru in the background at_ _5:13_ _omfg_

 **_novakings_ ** _(1 hour ago)_

 _Why is drunk Kenjirou actually so precious though_ _😭 😭 😭_

 **_Krista Post_ ** _(2 hours ago)_

_hold on, taichi and eita know each other????_

**_idk idc_ ** _(3 hours ago)_

 _my heart is melting at the way tsutomu looked at kenjirou at_ _3:23_ _💕🥺_

⏸

Kenjirou woke up groggy, and only due to the fact that Taichi had yanked the curtains of their hotel room open.

“Let me go back to sleep,” Kenjirou groaned, pulling the covers back up over his face.

“No way.” Taichi pried the blankets from Kenjirou’s fingers. “You should check out the video I posted this morning. My channel.”

Kenjirou narrowed his eyes, but Taichi had already started making his way towards the bathroom.

“Where’s Tsutomu?”

“He and Tadashi went downstairs for the free breakfast,” Taichi called back.

Kenjirou closed his eyes for a few more seconds, but his brain was already too wired to fall back to sleep. He sighed, flipping over and fumbling around the bedside table for his phone.

He hesitated for a moment before pulling up Taichi’s channel and clicking on his newest upload.

The video was only around six minutes long, but Kenjirou felt as though he had aged thirty years in the time it took to watch it. He scrolled through the comments, but they only made everything so much _worse_.

He grabbed one of the decorative pillows on his bed and smothered his face with it. He heard Taichi shuffling out of the bathroom and stopping in front of his bed. Despite his best efforts, the pillow was ripped out of his hands.

“You watched it?” Taichi did his best to ask, but he was halfway through brushing his teeth, so it came out a bit muffled.

Kenjirou only groaned and, now decorative pillow-less, covered his eyes with his palms.

Before he could drag Taichi through hell and back for posting that video, the door clicked open.

“Good morning!” Tsutomu chirped. A gasp followed, along with an anxious “What’s wrong?”

“He’s sad he missed the free breakfast.”

Fuck Taichi.

“Oh! Don’t worry, Kenji, I brought you guys some donuts and yogurt!”

Kenjirou peeked out from behind his hands. Tsutomu was arranging his breakfast haul on the shared bureau.

If he was flustered by anything that'd happened in the video last night—if he even _remembered_ it or had watched the video—he didn't mention it. It was in Tsutomu's nature to look out for others, so he was probably just ignoring Kenjirou's embarrassing drunk behavior for Kenjirou's sake.

His hair could use a good combing, and his t-shirt needed to be ironed. His socks were mismatched, and he nearly tripped when he reached for his water bottle.

He was the best thing Kenjirou had ever seen.

🔀

Tsutomu had hoped their last day in California would be memorable, and it _was_ , just not in a particularly good way.

They had plans to go to Disney, but after only two hours of being there, Tadashi came down with a fever. Kenji and Kenjirou had gotten into a massive spat as well, nearly making a nearby child start crying.

Salvaging the footage he’d gotten that day before everything had gone awry had been a struggle, and he’d spent most of the first day back in their apartment working on it.

The unbridled joy bubbling in the air the following weekend is what he had expected their Disney trip to feel like.

He and his friends had just finished up dinner, and they were headed to a free music festival happening a few blocks away from Tadashi’s place.

As he was prone to doing, Tsutomu had fallen back a bit behind the others, walking shoulder-to-shoulder with Kenjirou. He was used to the quiet that accompanied Kenjirou, and it was one of his favorite things about his friend.

Tsutomu was all high-energy and loud laughter, and it really _wasn’t_ an act. But he did go out of his way to make sure people were happy, that they were impressed by his talents.

Sometimes it was nice to soak up the silence of someone who he knew wasn’t searching for cracks in his armor.

Twilight was upon them. A cobalt blue sky hung above, dotted with pastel pink clouds, so soft and magical that they hardly looked real. The air was balmy, but not overbearingly hot—the kind of heat that made you sleepy, like a warm hug.

Up ahead, Kenji was telling some story that had Tadashi in hysterics. It must have been good because Taichi was doubled over as well.

Tsutomu glanced at Kenjirou, who was swinging his arms lightly as he walked. Tsutomu didn’t give himself time to think, simply reached out and grabbed Kenjirou’s hand, lacing their fingers together.

Kenjirou startled slightly but kept walking.

“There’s no one even watching,” Kenjirou said finally.

“Just in case.”

Another pause.

“Okay,” Kenjirou said quietly.

Tsutomu breathed a sigh of relief. 

“Okay,” he agreed.

When they arrived at the park the festival was being held at, Tsutomu rummaged through his backpack for his camera.

“Lemme film for a while?” Tadashi asked.

“Okay!” Tsutomu passed the camera over to him.

They were seated on a blanket Tadashi had brought. The festival had already begun, but it was more background noise than anything.

Taichi returned with two funnel cakes that everyone split, and Kenji told another story so ridiculous that by the end of it even Kenjirou was snickering.

Everything about the night was so absolutely _perfect_. Tsutomu was buzzing with happiness, and when he happened to look at Kenjirou next to him, he found the other boy softly smiling as well.

“What?” Tsutomu asked because such untainted happiness was rare from Kenjirou.

“Nothing,” Kenjirou shook his head. “You’ve got powdered sugar on your face, dumbie.”

“Where?” Tsutomu raised a hand to his face.

“Hold still,” Kenjirou got on his knees and scooted closer. He leaned close, dragging his thumb across Tsutomu’s nose.

Tsutomu held his breath, terrified he’d say something stupid and far too honest if he opened his mouth.

“Get a room, will ya?” Kenji yelled across Taichi and Tadashi.

“Fuck off,” Kenjirou slid back into his own spot, turning to glare at Kenji.

The moment had died as quickly as it’d begun, but the evening felt endless.

When Tsutomu looked back on the footage the next day, he reminded himself to thank Tadashi for getting so many excellent shots of Kenjirou amidst the twinkling lights, a few where he was even laughing.

⏩

A week later, Tsutomu's good mood was promptly soured over dinner with Taichi.

“So, I think you guys should probably be good to film a breakup video tomorrow.”

Tsutomu stopped chewing, his takeout long forgotten as he stared at Taichi across the table.

“Is that cool?” Taichi raised an eyebrow.

“Sure,” Tsutomu said hoarsely.

Setting up his camera the next day, though, felt anything _but_ cool. 

Even _less_ cool when Kenjirou refused to be in the video, saying he had an appointment he’d forgotten about, that it’d be weird for him to be in it anyways. He’d grabbed his keys and phone and left before Tsutomu could get another word in.

The _least_ cool when Tsutomu could feel himself getting choked up as he told the camera that, yeah, they’d broken up.

⏩

Tsutomu had been too glum to properly edit the breakup video, so he’d shoved it onto Taichi’s plate. It was scheduled to go up today, so Tsutomu had been lying in his bed, all the lights out, constantly refreshing his channel page.

A soft knock on the door distracted him, and a tiny spark of hope wondered if it was Kenjirou.

He’d been pointedly ignoring Tsutomu since Tsutomu had filmed the breakup video a week ago. 

Tsutomu wasn’t surprised. Kenjirou hadn’t wanted to do it to begin with, and Tsutomu had grown far too comfortable with the whole arrangement. Kenjirou was just so…convincing. Tsutomu hadn’t checked his channel analytics in weeks because his head was too busy spinning each time Kenjirou so much as looked his way.

Tsutomu was certain when he’d outlined the breakup video with Kenjirou, his true colors had bled through. Tsutomu was horribly transparent, and it was probably _super_ obvious that his feelings were anything but fake.

Kenjirou was perceptive, so he’d undoubtedly caught on. He wasn’t the most socially adept, so he’d likely avoid Tsutomu as much as possible until their lease was up, then he’d phase Tsutomu out of his life completely.

It was what Tsutomu deserved. He should have never agreed to Taichi’s plan, no matter how good his intentions may have been.

Unfortunately, that didn’t stop him from perking up every time Kenjirou snuck out of his bedroom for a glass of water or got home from a convenience store run.

This time was no exception, and he couldn’t help the way his stomach dropped when the door creaked open and Taichi entered.

“Hey,” he said. He flipped the light switch on. “You okay?”

Taichi had been busy preparing for an end-of-summer internship, so he hadn’t been home enough the past week to get the full picture. Still, with Kenjirou avoiding human interaction even more than usual combined with Tsutomu’s melodramatic behavior, he seemed to have at least some grasp on the situation.

Tsutomu nodded lamely.

“Sure…” Taichi took a seat at Tsutomu’s desk. “Listen, I was going through comments on some of your recent videos, and a lot of people were requesting that type of video where couples, like, do each other’s makeup?”

Tsutomu didn’t bother replying.

“So, I was thinking maybe you could post that to bring in one more swoop of subscribers, then we can upload the breakup video like next week or the week after or whatever?”

“I don’t wanna,” Tsutomu said weakly, “and Kenjirou won’t wanna either.”

"He's in his room right now. I was gonna go talk to him if you want to come with me.”

Tsutomu rolled over, letting out another pathetic noise.

Taichi tugged his arm, pulling him upright.

"Come on."

Taichi pushed him out of his room and down the hall, stopping in front of Kenjirou's door. He knocked twice.

"Go away. I'm busy."

"I got you a coffee while I was out," Taichi lied.

A pause, then the soft shuffle of footsteps. The door slowly opened. Kenjirou frowned when he realized he was being ambushed.

"Liar," he hissed.

He moved to shut the door, but Taichi shoved his foot in the door jamb before it could close.

"Get _out,_ " Kenjirou tried to shove Taichi out, but he had a good half a foot on Kenjirou and way more muscle mass.

He pushed past Kenjirou, dragging Tsutomu along with him. They dropped ungracefully onto Kenjirou's bed, while Kenjirou stayed planted by the door, arms crossed and livid. After a moment, he finally spared them a glance.

"Well? Whatever it is, spit it out."

"A lot of people had requested a 'boyfriend does my makeup' type video, so—"

"Absolutely not."

"—I thought you could film that, and then we'd post the breakup video next week instead."

" _No,_ " Kenjirou repeated, "I didn't want to get involved in any of this to begin with. I don't want to have Tsutomu's army of fans ready to burn down my door for breaking his heart or whatever. Stop trying to drag me in even further."

"Don't be so dramatic," Taichi said. "There won't be that much backlash."

Kenjirou scoffed, which didn't really help disprove the _dramatic_ claim made against him.

"Fine," he finally said, still boiling. "But this is it. I don't want to be in any of the channel's videos after this ever again."

Tsutomu's heart sunk. His worst suspicions had been confirmed. Their friendship was in ruins, and there was nothing he could do about it.

"Deal," he barely got out.

Even if Kenjirou had agreed, this was still going to be terrible.

⏩

 _Definitely terrible_ , Tsutomu confirmed.

Tadashi had dropped off some of his old palettes and brushes, and Kenjirou was currently pawing through them. That is, when he wasn’t glaring at Tsutomu.

Tsutomu was struggling to set up the camera and find the best lighting with Kenjirou shooting him absolutely fatal looks.

He finally managed to make it work, and he settled down on the floor beside Kenjirou, who immediately shuffled further away.

“You’re gonna be out of shot,” Tsutomu said tiredly. He just wanted to get this video over with.

Kenjirou huffed before scooting back over.

“Whatever.”

Tsutomu sighed before rereading the beginning of the rough script Taichi had given him.

“Okay, get ready.”

Tsutomu counted them in, then delivered his intro spiel as convincingly as he could manage. He figured Kenjirou wouldn’t look all _that_ out of place since his default face gave off the impression he was pissed all the time anyways. Viewers were used to it.

“Okay, you go first, then I’ll do yours,” Tsutomu turned to Kenjirou.

Kenjirou didn’t bother replying. He simply got to work, opening one of the palettes and loading a fat brush with a rosy pink color. Tsutomu held still as Kenjirou began dusting it along the apples of his cheeks. He went cross-eyed when Kenjirou rubbed it roughly against the tip of his nose.

“Blush? On my nose?!” he squawked.

“Yeah, cause you’re a fucking clown,” Kenjirou answered sharply.

There was a beat, then Tsutomu laughed. He couldn’t help it, and in his delirium, he wondered if he was imagining the way Kenjirou’s cross expression was beginning to soften.

“Okay, don’t blink,” Kenjirou instructed, less aggressive than before. So, maybe Tsutomu _wasn’t_ imagining it? Kenjirou really was loosening up?

Kenjirou placed a hand on Tsutomu’s shoulder and went to work with a mascara wand.

“You have perfect eyelashes for mascara,” Kenjirou said, so matter-of-factly that it barely registered as a compliment.

“Oh,” Tsutomu said softly, “thank you.”

Kenjirou did a hasty job with a clear lip gloss, concluding his work with a curt “Done.”

Now came the part Tsutomu wasn’t looking forward to. He took a deep breath, letting it out as he picked up the brush and palette Kenjirou had started with. He mulled over the colors for a minute before choosing a coral shade.

He followed the same routine, beginning by dusting Kenjirou’s cheeks.

It was a painfully humid day, even with their apartment’s lousy AC blasting on high, and Kenjirou’s bangs were starting to curl.

“I love when your hair gets like this,” Tsutomu said in a fit of honesty. 

If not for the blush on Kenjirou’s cheeks, Tsutomu would have guessed his cheeks were naturally coloring under the compliment.

"It looks stupid," Kenjirou tried to argue.

"No, it's cute," Tsutomu insisted.

"Whatever," Kenjirou made a hearty effort to look anywhere but in front of him. 

Tustomu rummaged around in Tadashi's makeup bag for a bobby pin. He gently pushed Kenjirou's bangs back, securing them with the pin, then moved on to his eyes.

He skipped the mascara, choosing to swipe a translucent glitter shadow across Kenjirou’s eyelids instead. With his eyes closed, Kenjirou looked nothing short of ethereal.

To finish the look, Tsutomu chose a peach lip gloss. His hand trembled as he cupped Kenjirou’s jaw to hold him steady. Kenjirou was absolutely still, but Tsutomu’s hand shook as he applied the lip gloss.

He set the lip gloss applicator down, but his hand was still gently holding Kenjirou in place. When he looked back up, Kenjirou looked angelic, and Tsutomu was _so_ far gone.

He’d already screwed everything up, right? Things couldn’t get any worse, right? He had nothing to lose.

“I like you so much,” he whispered.

“Tsu,” Kenjirou’s eyes darted to the camera, “I think the battery died.”

“Okay.”

“Okay? We’ve been recording for nothing—”

“Can I kiss you?” Tsutomu’s other hand came up to hold the other side of Kenjirou’s face.

“What?” Kenjirou’s eyes grew wide.

“Sorry, I shouldn’t have even asked. I just—”

“Yes,” Kenjirou cut him off. “Yes, you can kiss me.”

Tsutomu blinked, and his hands were shaking even more, but Kenjirou was leaning in and pressing a warm hand around the back of his neck, and then they were _kissing._

It was soft and slow and a million times better than Tsutomu ever could imagine.

It felt like summer nights where they'd lie on the floor of the living room, cicadas buzzing outside, drinking soda until they had stomachaches. It felt like sitting too close on the subway, Kenjirou nudging him when it was their stop. It felt like Kenjirou waiting for him after class, and _no,_ _he doesn't really wanna hang out, it's just convenient_ , but they spend the whole afternoon sharing a piece of cake Kenjirou stole from his TA's office anyways.

When they finally had to part for air, Tsutomu pushed his nose against Kenjirou’s cheek and laughed.

“I wasn’t faking,” he grinned.

“Me neither, you idiot,” Kenjirou murmured, tugging on a piece of Tsutomu’s hair.

“ _Real boyfriends!”_

Tsutomu tackled Kenjirou to the floor, dragging him into an awkward hug and nearly knocking his tripod over in the process.

 _That’s okay_ , he thought.

He could film a million videos, but none of them would ever be as enthralling as Kenjirou was in that moment, face all scrunched up, trying to suppress a smile as Tsutomu laughed into his neck.

Maybe Taichi hadn’t hatched such a bad plan after all.

▶️

_The video starts out with shots of a riverbank, then it turns to Kenjirou, who rolls his eyes and shoves his hand in front of the camera._

_“Stop, your fingers are greasy!” Tsutomu whines._

_“Then don’t film me when I’m eating!”_

_“Obnoxious,” Tsutomu mutters, but he doesn’t sound all that upset._

_The video cuts to Kenjirou crouched down on a stretch of sidewalk, petting a cat._

_“Guys, comment below who’s cuter: Kenjirou or this cat.”_

_“Fuck off. This cat isn’t the one who’s gonna be paying for your dinner tonight,” Kenjirou looks up to glare into the camera, but it’s more teasing than anything._

_“Tell them where we’re going!” Tsutomu sings._

_“No,” Kenjirou gives one final parting pat to the cat’s head before standing up._

_“Tell them!”_

_“No!”_

_“We’re going somewhere fancy!”_

_“Will you shut up?”_

_“Tell them why!”_

_“No,” Kenjirou says for a third time, but a small smile is starting to show._

_“It’s our one year anniversary!”_

_The camera flips, so Tsutomu is front and center._

_“We’re special because we have two anniversaries. One for when we started fake dating and one for when we started real dating.”_

_“Please don’t include that.”_

_“Why? It’s true! It makes us special!”_

_“No, it makes us dumb as fuck,” Kenjirou says, more to the camera than Tsutomu._

_They bump shoulders, and Kenjirou moves to grab the camera, but Tsutomu holds it just out of reach._

_“No! You always film me doing embarrassing stuff!”_

_“It’s not my fault that everything you do is embarrassing!”_

_“Meanwhile you’re dating me?”_

_Kenjirou groans, Tsutomu laughs, and the video cuts to a scene of the summer sun setting against a sky blended of fiery oranges and rich magentas before fading to black._

_ 810 COMMENTS _

_📍 Pinned by Tsutomu Goshiki_

**_kj.shirabu_ ** _(12 hours ago)_

_this is so sappy i can't stand you_

**_1nfern0_ ** _(2 hours ago)_

_I THOUGHT HE WAS GONNA DROP THE CAMERA HAHAHA_

**_Taichi K._** _(4 hours ago)_

_i cant fucking wait to move out_

**_Cobweb Toaster_** _(5 hours ago)_

_I Still can't believe they Pranked us so hard -___-_

⏹️

**Author's Note:**

> narrator: and they were roommates!  
> me: oh my god they were roommates
> 
> i actually really enjoyed writing a lot of this?? especially the actual video scenes!! so i hope it shows! and although it was rather anti-climatic (i feel like i rushed the end a little bit. ok i definitely rushed the end a little bit), i hope some people still find it a fun read!
> 
> please leave a comment if ur so inclined!! <3


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